I enjoyed each minute of this holiday season:
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| Our sweet Nativity, with baby cousin as Jesus. |
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| Steve playing his traditional organ hymns. |
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| Breaking out the pinata! |
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| Some of my favorite gifts: The Piano Guys CD (I love them!) and a pizza peel. |
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| Ringing in the New Year in style! |
I sang a duet this year in church with my husband (who was insecure about it, but did an awesome job!). It's been a long time since I've performed. The emotional turmoil of cancer took its toll on my voice, so it felt really great to be able to sing again. Afterward, someone mentioned how glad they were that I was there to perform. I think they meant they were glad I wasn't up north, but when they said that, I realized what a blessing it was for me to be here, on this earth, to share my talents. All throughout the day, I kept reminding myself how grateful I was to be alive and with my family this Christmas.
On Christmas day, I stopped wearing hats. It was difficult at first (sometimes it still is), but my hair keeps growing! What a wonder: to have hair! I even tried to dye it. I went for a carroty-red at first that I just couldn't get used to, so after a couple of days I dyed it again, this time a brown that now looks like a dark auburn.
When I moved home after radiation, I grabbed my life back with gusto. I've been attending a Zumba class about twice a week in a determined effort to make my future health a top priority. (Although, I have to watch out for those big hip swings. My old joints can't handle them. LOL!)
I took up a challenge to paint an underwater mural in one of my daughter's bedrooms. We're dividing the erstwhile "playroom" into two rooms so the older girls can have their own space. I was a little insecure about painting the mural, but I love to try new art expression, so I "dived" in (ha ha!). So far, it's turned out better than I expected, and I've been pleased with my effort. The only thing I don't like is how long it is taking to finish.
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| Starting out. Notice how boring and plain the walls are. Time to spruce it up! |
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| It was tricky to blend the colors together to look like an ocean. I'm so glad I discovered glaze! |
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| Mermaid half finished. I guess since I went without hair so long, I have to give my creations wild crazy hair! |
In February, I will start my first job outside my home in almost twenty years. My husband needed a receptionist/secretary for tax season, and I volunteered. Hopefully, I can help this tax season go a little smoother for him than last year's--when I was diagnosed right as he was starting his first tax season as an independent CPA. I think Steve was the one losing hair last year as he tried to juggle all the chemo treatments with tax clients. He's really a trooper!
I have just begun to pick up my pen and paper again to try and get some writing done. When I was first diagnosed, I thought I would have oodles of time to write, but the emotional roller coaster of cancer effectively cut off my creative brain as well as my voice. I haven't made much progress on my trilogy this year, but I hope that the creative juices will soon begin to flow again and I can get something accomplished toward my goal of becoming a published author.
So, things are going well. Forgive me if I don't write as often as I have in the past. I don't sit in my chair with exhaustion much anymore, or spend my days twiddling my thumbs waiting to recover from surgery (that will come in late April). I'm so grateful that I can get up and move around and take care of my family again! I didn't realize before what a blessing that is.
Someone recently shared a quote with me from Elder Holland who comforted a woman scarred by fire: "We look for Christ's scars because they are evidence of what He did for us," Elder Holland said. "Your scars tell a story, too. Although they may not make you feel attractive, they are a witness of a miracle, that God blessed you to live, and that you have accomplished very difficult things."
That quote touches my heart every time I read it. I have scars from this struggle, inside and out, and they will never go away. But they are also a reminder of all the Lord has done for me this year, to help me get through this and to allow me to stay here on earth with my friends and family a little while longer.
